This week’s question from my portal “The Neagle Code: Directions for Life” comes from Rebecca.
Hi David,
I have a 23 year-old daughter who is ruining her life. She doesn’t take responsibility for any of her actions, and she seems dedicated to distracting me from growing my business. I’ve heard you teach about unhealthy attachments, but she’s my daughter…
Any suggestions?
This is one of those questions for which there is no magic fix.
There are a couple of things here that you need to really think about.
1. You are 100% responsible for everything in your own life.
2. Your daughter is an adult so you are no longer responsible FOR her.
3. It is not your job to fix her. She is the only one who can change herself, and that’s only if she wishes to change.
That means that you have to decide that you are no longer going to tolerate toxic relationships in your life.
That doesn’t mean that you no longer love her.
In fact, the solution to your problem is to love her for who she is without judgment, and limit the time you spend with her by setting boundaries around what is acceptable in your life and what is not.
We all need to learn about cause and effect, and we are all responsible for our own choices and lives.
One of the best gifts we can give our children is to allow them to have their own experiences and carve their own way, even if we may not agree with them.
PS: The Neagle Code: Directions for Life is a weekly no-cost program that is open to everyone! Each week, I’ll select and personally respond to one question received via the above “The Neagle Code” page that I feel in my heart will help the most people. (You may choose to remain anonymous if you wish, with our full support.) It is my deep, heartfelt intention that ~ in answering your questions ~ I may provide you with the Universal Truths that in committed application, will set you free. Simply submit YOUR burning question at: www.DavidNeagle.com/ask-david to participate.
