How Do I Quiet My Nerves Around Taking A Big Step?

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This week’s question from our portal “Ask Us Anything” comes from Brad.

About a month ago, I was like, “I want to buy a house, but I’m afraid I’m not going to get qualified.” Well, in a pretty short period of time, I found a real estate agent and started working with him and found out about a program where I would be able to get qualified based on the bank statements of the business. And so, in a pretty short period of time, I got the pre-qualification letter, and for a house that’s a significant upgrade from where I’m at right now.  

Now, I’m getting cold feet. I think in my mind, I’m coming up with reasons why it’s not perfect.  Part of me is thinking, “Well, maybe it’s too much money, maybe I should negotiate”, but another side is saying, “I don’t really need to move that bad.”  I just had this burning desire and now that I guess I had this fear that I wouldn’t be qualified, and now that I am qualified, it feels like second guessing I’m myself.  I just feel a little lost, and I’m wondering… how do I get these feelings of self-doubt to stop? 

It’s totally normal. You’re taking a step-up. When we take a step-up, we should be scared and excited at the same time. And that’s where you are. I mean, that’s absolutely normal. So, your subconscious mind is working correctly. That’s fantastic, so let’s start there. But remember, when you’re scared, what are you supposed to do? You say to yourself, “Okay, subconscious. Thanks for letting me know. I know there’s an unknown here, but I’ve got it. I can handle this. Just calm down. Everything’s going to be fine.” After you’ve made this enough of a practice, you’ll start to realize:  

The more you make decisions to move in the direction of what you desire, the more the nervousness will stop. 

The nervousness only exists where no decision is. You make the decision and all the weight comes off. You feel so much better. Because now, you’re clear and you’re committed.

It’s really astounding how much success we actually talk ourselves out of. We convince ourselves that we can’t, and we come up with a whole stack of reasons. And if we would just move through it, it dissipates, just as if you’re walking right through fog. 

David

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In today’s Q&A, we talked about how fear and second-guessing creep in right when you’re about to make a big move. That moment when you’re this close to stepping into something greater—but hesitation, doubt, and “logical” reasons start flooding in.

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