This week’s question from our portal “Ask Us Anything” comes Lara.
I’m having a conversation today with a client who’s been blaming me for a situation that isn’t my fault. I want to approach this from a creator orientation rather than getting defensive. I ideally want them to realize that what they’re complaining about has nothing to do with me – it’s their own decision. How do I stay in the right mindset during this meeting when I feel like something might try to pull me out of it?
That’s not your concern. Your concern is just to know that that’s the truth. Otherwise, you’re attempting to change their will, their ability to choose. You only have to be concerned with your belief around what the situation is.
I’m not saying you can’t have a conversation with them, but don’t be attached to the outcome. If they choose to believe whatever they want to believe, let them do whatever they want and go find another client.
The person with the most certainty always sells the other one. Just be certain about your position.
If somebody is determined to blame someone for something, all the explanation in the world is not going to change their mind. From an energetic perspective, remember they’ll be picking up on your energy. If your energy is needy – like you need them to agree with you – they’re going to sense that something’s wrong.
This is a huge lesson for you about advocating for yourself. The more you advocate for yourself, the easier it becomes. There’s tremendous energy behind it when you do it because you haven’t really advocated for yourself much, and it’s time to start.
The key to dissipating that aggressive energy is that you don’t need the outcome to be whatever you think it needs to be. You just need to advocate for yourself. You don’t need their agreement. You just need to speak your truth.
If they have an emotional block about their position, all the convincing in the world won’t get them to back off. Just be good with yourself. That’s the best we can do in life. We don’t have to change other people.
