This week’s question from our portal “Ask Us Anything” comes from Veronica.
I’ve been working on changing my self-image, I’m visualizing myself as the person who has what I want, and I’m acting as if I’m doing the practices. But I still feel like a fraud. Like I’m pretending to be someone I’m not. How do I get past that feeling? When does it start to feel real instead of fake?
You feel like a fraud because you’re still identified with your old self-image. And your old self-image is fighting to stay alive.
Here’s what you need to understand: that feeling of being a fraud is a sign you’re doing it right. It means you’re actually changing. If you felt completely comfortable, you wouldn’t be growing.
Every single person who’s ever transformed their life has gone through this exact same feeling. They felt like a fraud right up until the moment they weren’t.
The new self-image becomes real when you stay in it long enough that your subconscious accepts it as truth. And your subconscious accepts it as truth when you consistently act from that identity regardless of how you feel.
Think about it like this: when you were learning to drive, it felt fake at first, right? You had to consciously think about every single thing. Check the mirror. Use the turn signal. Watch your speed. It felt forced and unnatural.
But you kept doing it anyway. And eventually, your subconscious took over and now you drive without thinking about it. It became your natural identity.
Same thing here. Keep being the person you’re becoming even though it feels fake. Your subconscious will catch up. And one day you’ll realize you’re not pretending anymore. You just ARE that person.
But you can’t wait for it to feel real before you commit to it. You commit to it until it becomes real.
That’s how identity shift works.
